Site news and other stuff.


Website Update

2018-03-25 01:42:38

I got rid of those carousel sliders. As sliders go they were pretty cool, but even the best sliders are an eyesore, so I got rid of the fuckers so the site can be a better place for people's eyes.
So this is 4.2, slider-free since 2018


2018-03-16 21:02:41

The Society of Misfits series of anthologies has accepted my short horror story, A Gift in the Mirror. They'll release it on October 23 of 2018. So, thanks to Bards and Sages Publishing for accepting me into their lair.

The Society of Misfits

NEW NOVEL: Missing To Mars

2017-11-15 19:10:18

My latest book is available in e-book formats now, on Amazon and Kobo.

Missing to Mars is a science fiction mystery story, rooted in alternate history. It's partly inspired by Graham Hancock's work, exploring the possibility that pre-Egyptian civilization might have been more advanced than we thought, and didn't really die out. This book takes those ideas several steps further into the realm of the fantastic. I love the idea of some special torch of cosmic knowledge being shared and spread in secret.

But the main action is much simpler than that: Paul and his wife Fiona move to Mars, and Fiona promptly goes missing. What's worse than losing your loved ones in such a remote location? Arguably, the thing that took her.

It's available as an e-book, and should soon come out in paperback as well.

Huge thanks to Double Dragon Publishing, who took a chance on this book.

NEW BOOK: The Adventure Poem of Julius Cinnamon

2017-08-22 01:19:48

Another labour of love and hate is finally finished and ready for the light of day.

The Adventure Poem of Julius Cinnamon is a fast-paced, epic adventure about an unstoppable lunatic with world-changing plans. Traitors and rivals try to cannibalize his empire and ruin his plans, so he strikes back with outrageous fury.

It can be a pretty violent book. Some scenes made me uncomfortable to write. The guy is a beast of a man, and beasts aren't always nice. But he's one of my favourite characters and I can't wait to see what readers think of him.

The e-book is available on Smashwords and Amazon. The paperback is ready, and will appear in the Amazon store within a couple days.

New Short Fiction: The Lifeguard published in Depraved Desires 2.

2017-08-04 03:46:09

I wrote a disturbing and offensive short story about a lifeguard who... oversteps his authority and the laws of nature. Apparently the fine folks at Hellbound Books are into that kind of thing because they're publishing it in their collection of erotic horror: Depraved Desires 2. As of August 4, 2017, this collection will be available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle formats.

New Publishing Business

2017-08-04 01:27:05

I registered a business with the Province of Ontario. The business is called Spiral Machines Productions, and I'll use it to publish my own books and music, as well as some other projects I have planned for the future. Who knows, maybe I'll publish books for other writers, too. But not yet.

Check out the Spiral Machines website at

It's pretty but I'll have to heavily re-work it soon to match my business.

New Website is LIVE

2017-07-01 16:59:04

My newest, biggest, coolest website is fucking LIVE now.

I maybe have a problem with re-vamping my website too much, but I swear to Jesus that this is the ultimate BEST website I've made so far (except maybe the one before the one before the last one, which was beautiful but not mobile-responsive enough). Anyway, if I want to change this one I can just change the front end. The back end should be SOLID AS FUCK.

Soon I'll be releasing another new book. As always, I have lots of plans, and this site will be the focal point for that.


And get mailed hard.

Stuff I might email you:

About Me:

I write weird stories and novels. I like vivid wordplay and far-out adventures. I like to explore subtle ideas, juxtapositions, scary aspects of personal development, and just generally far-out stuff. I like Hard Art, stuff that's upsetting, but also stuff that's just fun and beautiful. That's what's fun for me, and I hope it will be fun for you too. Fun and scary.

Most of my books are independently published. I like the control. I like hiring cover artists and designing the book myself. I have worked with publishers, and I'll do so again, but I'm a very DIY kinda guy and I love the process of giving you something that's completely my own invention.

When I make electronic music I tend to use the rhythm and beat-structure of dance music, while the melodic structure is more influenced by rock, funk, and metal. I've used FruityLoops, Reason, and the powerful (and volatile) suite of music production software in Linux.

I was born in Newfoundland, Canada. I got my degree from St. Thomas University in Fredericton, New Brunswick. I've worked as a line cook, machine operator, web designer, and a bunch of other things.

I also do audio production Psymposia's weekly consciousness-expansion podcast. They're a great organization and you should check them out.

 About this site:

I've "re-vamped" my personal website way too many times. Usually I just want something noisy, jarring, and fun to look at. But I decided I needed something more functional so I built this content-management system in Flask, with Python. Now if I want to update it I'll just change the visuals, but the backend should be solid.

This is the main source for information about my work. Details about my books and music, my publishing history, where to buy my stuff, plus my blog and links to other cool site.

...but it's also a place to just put ridiculous things on the internet. I like internet noise. Glitch art. Broken things. So humour me by exploring it a little bit.

You can drop me a line at info [at] pattmayne [dot] com. I'll probably respond.

hidden_image hidden_image hidden_image