Everybody needs money, but not everybody is as smart as you. More importantly, not everybody has this scientifically-normalized "How-To-Guide" for step-by-step money-making.
Mathematically, there are steps you can take to actually make more money. Leave your poor friends behind and say hello to your rich friends because you're (honestly) probably going to start making a lot of money really soon.
Includes step-by-step instructions for:
-Checking the Couch Cushions for loose change
Part of the "Go Help Yourself" series of self-help books. With this series you get:
Styles & Genres: self-help, satire
Released: July, 2016
Stories of insanity, horror, and other kinds of fun.
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Stuff I might email you:
FETISHES...hypocrisy/Fabergé eggs (or any jeweled egg)
FAVOURITE WINTER SPORTS...skiing/shoveling
POLITICAL AFFILIATIONS...Radical Chronodyke/Millenarianistic Chronodyke
FAVOURITE PILLS...speed/microdoses of mushrooms/digestive enzymes
RELIGION...at the end of time, time begins, and flows backwards toward the horror of infinitely compressing "big bang" (AKA big crush where we are all one, squeezed together, elbow-to-elbow, really uncomfortable and socially awkward)(this is why we can never know anything, because our minds our backwards, like the stitching on the back of a decorative patch, and the pre-sensory ingredients for consciousness, the responsive living universe, is utterly alien in its proper time direction, and we are alone, and it doesn't even know we exist)
MARITAL STATUS...see "PETS"
PREFERRED TRANSDUCTION PARADIGM...bifurcated oblidisk gyration schema